Wednesday 27 May 2015

WHY DON'T YOU SLEEP ON IT?



Some people say that there really isn’t anything like a good night’s sleep to put things into perspective. They may have a point. However, like everyone else, I expect that an occasional sleepless night is probably inevitable.

I call the preoccupations that trouble us in the middle of the night, ‘three o’clock in the morning’. This is the time in the middle of the night when sleep has eluded us, but whatever is bothering us continues to keep us awake. No wonder we can’t sleep, when our thoughts are racing around and around and around.

Strangely, usually one of two things happen when you lose sleep over something that was bothering you. You either get so tired that you stop caring about it, or you finally get such a deep sleep, that the problem no longer has the power to disturb, depress or weigh you down.

I wouldn’t be surprised if doctors who suggest taking two aspirin and giving them a call in the morning, get fewer call backs than do those ready to see their patient’s anytime they ask to see the doctor.

In fact, sometimes I wonder whether many, if not most, of our problems would go away more easily if we just ignored them for a couple of days. 

In the days of ‘snail mail’ I am happy to have once saved a friend serious humiliation by convincing her to delay mailing her self-abasing letter until the postal service resumed on Monday morning.

Unfortunately, today we can share our ideas and reactions 24/7. I suspect that there must be some wild retractions and face-saving going on pretty regularly these days ‘The Morning After’.

I may suggest that we delay quick action and reaction to a problem, especially anything involving the phrase, ‘that’s it, I’ve had enough’. 

I doubt however, that many of us, when faced with something really worrying, can do this. In fact, it seems actually to go against every natural instinct we have to expect us to suddenly be patient and calm at a time when we feel ready to explode.

More likely instead, most of us probably feel a compelling and consuming need to deal with whatever problems we have head on. Unfortunately this sometimes means we want/need to talk them out either with some long suffering friend, or sometimes even with anyone in hearing range.

We somehow convince ourselves that doing something is better than doing nothing. Maybe not. In fact, sometimes I think that telling myself, ‘When in doubt, do nothing’, is the best solution to a troubling problem.

I am convinced that there are times when doing nothing may actually be a better choice, than acting rashly and hastily, in some usually misbegotten attempt to immediately resolve an issue.

Experience has also shown me that ‘All Nighters’ aren’t likely to find most of us making our best decisions or solving important problems well.

If only we could pretend that today’s woes are long resolved and behind us and were somehow able to miraculously skip the stress that usually lies ahead, life would be so much simpler.

Maybe we can’t do that, but maybe we can see that, whoever thought up the saying ‘this too shall pass’ probably knew that few problems look the same the next day.
  
One way I have found, to sometimes help myself when something is worrying me into exhaustion, is to try and completely stop whatever I am doing, and concentrate as hard as I can to remember whatever was bothering me on the same day last year. I usually can’t and I doubt most of us could. 

One thing is almost certain, a year from today something else is probably going to be keeping me/us awake at night. 

Like everyone else, I now accept that an occasional sleepless night is inevitable. I guess it’s just another Life Lesson to remind us that some things happen in life that we need to deal with in order to continue moving forward.

By the way, sometimes I even take my own advice and actually put my problems, and myself, to bed and determine to deal with whatever is bothering me in the morning…after a good night’s sleep.

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