MEN AND WOMEN

I am often amused when I watch a film or programme during which Men are giving each other advice about Women. The most realistic statement that is ever made is: Women, can’t live with them; can’t live without them.

Well, some Men do live without us, just as some of us Women live without Men. However, neither of us, in my opinion, does all that well, without the counterweight of one sex complementing and completing the other.

Meanwhile, Women can and do spend hours discussing Men. Often when I read ‘chick lit’ (the books girls and women write, and read) I see also the frustration and bewilderment about life and the efforts to try and make sense of it all that Women experience and try to understand. Unlike Men, we can spend hours analyzing relationships and taking them apart and trying to put them together again. 

Some Women dismiss our need for Men any longer. Others would love to have a Man in their lives. Some have them and would gladly give them away; others would do almost anything to keep them.

Those of us who Married good ones, would give a limb to see them again even for a moment; those who are Divorced often would given anything to never see them again.

Women cry when they are happy. This seems strange except to Women. Women find they need to explain that not all tears originate from sadness, although many of them do. We are often moved by things we find sweet, loving, tender, and beautiful. This brings on tears almost as often as sadness does.

On the other hand, we cry a lot more often out of sadness because in Life we find much to be sad about. There is the pain of others and our own pain, both physical and emotional. There is the weight of the world upon us as we try to understand war and killing and brutality and slavery and rape and hunger and many other senseless cruelties which we humans afflict upon each other.

I think that many more tears are shed by Women who are angry and frustrated at what they feel and cannot change, than about almost anything else. In fact, it is almost worse that most Women can’t express her anger and frustration in a way that is cathartic and simple, although Men seem to be able to do this relatively easily.

A Man driven beyond his limit, punches another Man and then they go off and have a drink together. In Women however, anger and frustration accumulate within us, and usually only have a verbal outlet on occasion to a close friend. Our anger does not clear when we have ranted and raved.

An angry Woman, like a Drunken Woman is not an attractive person. The high pitched voice is against her. A screeching harpie termagant is someone we all want to run from. An angry Woman, rages at the Moon, and often begins to cry. Her voice breaks, she cries even harder, even piteously. She cannot get the words out, and you think she will choke to death.

A Woman in this state is not a pretty sight nor is she effective at either explaining or solving the problem she is trying to describe and resolve. The crying pained face trying to express her frustration and sometimes very legitimate real pain, isn’t much better. This is not a beautiful face and even to other Women the sight of very great pain is something we can only hope to try and comfort and relieve.

Only after she is calm again can she reflect on WHAT I SHOULD HAVE SAID and settle down resignedly to the fact that it is always going to be hard to express anger.

And yet, this is the same person who carries the burden of Motherhood and will single handedly raise her children, walk on hot coals to get to them, fight their battles and make any sacrifice for anyone she loves, up to and including starving and dying. Perhaps, ultimately we are a mystery to ourselves.

Personally speaking, I must admit that I understand good Women much more easily and much better than I do the selfish, self-centered ego maniacs that try to better Men and usually are other Women’s worst enemies.

Since I genuinely like the Human Race and have always been glad that it is comprised of both Men and Women, I feel that we are here together as a counterweight and balancing off in a complimentary way for each other.

I end by saying I hope that there will always be enough of us who feel that the opposite sex is necessary both for our survival and well-being, so that we may continue to cohabit the planet and each others lives in the interesting way Men and Women have through what are likely now, the countless generations, we have existed and survived as a species.