TRUST YOUR GUT INSTINCT

The more I think about it, the more we push aside our suspicions and uneasiness that something is not right in a situation, the more likely we are to find out, later on, that we should have paid attention.

When the movie, He’s Just Not That Into You (2009) came out, one of the most important things it told us is that when we want someone or something to fill a need in our lives, we will convince ourselves that any reservations we have can be ignored and that everything is, or soon will be, fine.

When our hopes are not realized, when nothing comes of what we hoped was a promising situation, it might only be much later that we admit to ourselves that we were hoping that somehow, something exceptional will happen and give us what we thought we wanted or needed at the time.

Instead it is more likely that we likely will not fulfil our dreams by trying to force a situation to be what we want it to be. More likely, it is almost inevitable that instead we will have some of our worst fears realized.

At best, some disappointment or disillusionment is almost inevitable when we realize that our hope to reform, change or remold reality to fit our hopes is not going to happen.

Eventually I concluded that regarding people, especially a partner, that if you don’t like 90% of what you see in a person, you might best keep moving.

I understand very well that in your mind (and mine, all too often) we both feel (or have felt) that a person would be perfect, if only, we could change the other person.

When this happens again, and it will, since we are all human, don’t beat yourself up. Try to incorporate the fact that when we want something we sell it to ourselves.

Because this is what it is in our nature to do, even when we know it will not give us what we want, eventually work toward trusting your instincts more and responding to them, not dismissing them. Like a headache, they are an early warning system that something is not what it should be.

Along with this conscious awareness that we are having doubts, we can perhaps eventually stop ourselves from pushing them aside while hoping we might have our needs met now.

Although it is harder and requires patience and withdrawal from temptation to settle for what we sense instinctively is not right for us, it is important to do just that. 

When you consider how much time and energy we are about to tie up before we are free to move ahead again; trusting the warning signs may help to avoid delaying the fulfilment of your dreams even longer. 

Being aware and thinking about what your dreams are, and how wonderful it would feel to have them become reality, can help us avoid more trouble and wasted time.

I assure you that you actually know when the real and authentic person or thing comes along because, your gut instinct just confirms everything you see and feel. It is right because it feels right and everything from what we both see and feel comes together naturally.