BIRDS OF A FEATHER

On Sunday, I fed friends and family in an Easter dinner. Since my entire family was not able to attend, for the first time, I invited a cousin and her husband, a friend who now lives nearby, two of my brothers and my three older nephews. One brother was a surprise attendee. One nephew had gone down because of an all nighter and didn’t, but another did. Everyone got along and some stayed late for quite a long visit.

In the post mortem, my friend said that she’d enjoyed herself. She again met in person family members of mine she had not seen since my wedding all those years ago, but had, of course, often heard about from me.

Our late husbands worked together for a couple of decades and died within two years of each other. She and I have both had cancer, mine 15 years ago and hers recently. In addition, she and her husband knew my husband long before I did as well. Obviously also, we have known each other for a long time.

All of the above also tells you that my friend and I have a particular bond with each other based on many similar experiences in life and having some of the same people in common in the main parts of our lives and experiences.

Today we talked about a survey I’d just completed and some of the ‘odd’ questions they were asking. The study, about how concerned you are about your cancer returning, was bound to be unusual anyway. From experience, we both know that after Cancer, you are changed forever. Widowhood also is always a permanent factor and always will be.

Recently I have realized that I have some friends that I have known for over 40 years. One man was a mentor to me, one of my best friends I met right after college, my doctor I met around the time I met my husband, as is the friend I talk about above. A close friend of my mother’s also became a friend 20 years ago, just after my mother died, her daughter shortly after.

I can’t help but recognize that I have been a very lucky person and have had, and more importantly, continue to have, people around me for a very long time.

Not surprisingly, among the many gifts in life I have been given, these people who have been with me through so many of life’s experiences are among the greatest blessings. They are friends and mainstays in my life.

I consider myself among the most fortunate of people to have their understanding, support and friendship in my life. I am truly grateful.